Kate Moss: Writer

I have several self-imposed writing deadlines to meet today, so I’m off to the coffee shop to get some work done.

I’ll leave you with this bad news about your High School English teacher… she lied about a few things. On the other hand, she was right about several other things.

Things she was wrong about:

• Adverbs are NOT your friends. The man did not run quickly across the alley. He raced. He hurried. Find the right verb before you even think of propping it up with an adverb.
• A rhetorical question is NOT a great way to start any and all kinds of writing, but especially not your query letter. (If you disagree, see literary agent Nathan Bransford’s discussions of the subject here and here.)
• If you don’t like the first half of the book you do NOT have to read the rest of it. Too many books, too little time.
• No one has to read what you write. Your job is not to inform an obligated reader, but to catch and entertain a fickle one. You will not get to explain your choices, revise your grammar, or improve upon that first impression at a later date. One shot. That’s it. Edit carefully.

Things she was right about:

• Grammar does matter.
• Shakespeare is worth reading.
• The verb “to be” is not your friend. Ever.

On the whole, I don’t think she can be blamed for your overall success or failure as a writer. Unless you’ve been querying Nathan Bransford and starting your letters with rhetorical questions. Then it is truly all your English teacher’s fault that you’ve been rejected. Although your strategy might have a little bit to do with it.